The boss of a big company needed to call one of his employees about an urgent problem with one of the main computers.
He dialed the employees home phone number and was greeted with a child's whispered on the first ring, "Hello?"
Feeling put out at the inconvenience of having to talk to a youngster the boss asked, "Is your Daddy home?".
"Yes.", whispered the small voice.
May I talk with him?", the man asked.
To the surprise of the boss, the small voice whispered, "No."
Wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your Mommy there?".
"Yes.", came the answer.
"May I talk with her?".
Again the small voice whispered, "No."
Knowing that it was not likely that a young child would be left home alone, the boss decided he would just leave a message with the person who should be there watching over the child. "Is there any one there besides you?", the boss asked the child.
"Yes", whispered the child, "A policeman."
Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked, "May I speak with the policeman?".
"No, he's busy.", whispered the child.
"Busy doing what?", asked the boss.
"Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman.", came the whispered answer.
Growing concerned and even worried as he heard what sounded like a helicopter through the ear piece on the phone the boss asked, "What is that noise?".
"A hello-copper.", answered the whispering voice.
"What is going on there?", asked the boss, now alarmed.
In an awed whispering voice the child answered, "The search team just landed the hello-copper!"
Alarmed, concerned and more than just a little frustrated the boss asked, "Why are they there?"
Still whispering, the young voice replied along with a muffled giggle, "They're looking for me!"
Dec 15, 2009
Parents These Days
At one point during a game, the coach said to one of his young players, "Do you understand what cooperation is? What a team is?"
The little boy nodded in the affirmative.
"Do you understand that what matters is whether we win together as a team?"
The little boy nodded yes.
"So," the coach continued, "when a strike is called, or you're out at first, you don't argue or curse or attack the umpire. Do you understand all that?"
Again the little boy nodded.
"Good," said the coach. "Now go over there and explain that to your mother."
The little boy nodded in the affirmative.
"Do you understand that what matters is whether we win together as a team?"
The little boy nodded yes.
"So," the coach continued, "when a strike is called, or you're out at first, you don't argue or curse or attack the umpire. Do you understand all that?"
Again the little boy nodded.
"Good," said the coach. "Now go over there and explain that to your mother."
Dec 10, 2009
Do You Know Me?
A small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness to the stand in a trial -- a grandmotherly, elderly woman.
He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"
She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a young boy. And frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a rising big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you will never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."
The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Williams, do you know the defense attorney?"
She replied, "Why, yes I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. I used to baby-sit him for his parents. And he, too, has been a real disappointment to me. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. The man can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the shoddiest in the entire state. Yes, I know him."
At this point, the judge rapped the courtroom to silence and called both counselors to the bench.
In a very quiet voice, he said with menace, "If either of you asks her if she knows me, you'll be jailed for contempt!"
He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"
She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a young boy. And frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a rising big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you will never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."
The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Williams, do you know the defense attorney?"
She replied, "Why, yes I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. I used to baby-sit him for his parents. And he, too, has been a real disappointment to me. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. The man can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the shoddiest in the entire state. Yes, I know him."
At this point, the judge rapped the courtroom to silence and called both counselors to the bench.
In a very quiet voice, he said with menace, "If either of you asks her if she knows me, you'll be jailed for contempt!"
Hit and Run case
A very successful lawyer parked his brand-new Lexus in front of his office, ready to show it off to his colleagues. As he got out, a truck passed too close and completely tore the door off of the driver's side. The counselor immediately grabbed his cell phone, dialed 911, and within minutes a policeman pulled up.
Before the officer had a chance to ask any questions, the lawyer started screaming hysterically. His Lexus, which he had just picked up the day before, was now completely ruined and would never be the same, no matter what the body shop did to it.
When the lawyer finally wound down from his ranting and raving, the officer shook his head in disgust and disbelief.
"I can't believe how materialistic you lawyers are," he said. "You are so focused on your possessions that you don't notice anything else."
"How can you say such a thing?" asked the lawyer.
The cop replied, "Don't you know that your left arm is missing from the elbow down? It must have been torn off when the truck hit you."
"Ahhh!" screamed the lawyer. "Where's my Rolex!"
Before the officer had a chance to ask any questions, the lawyer started screaming hysterically. His Lexus, which he had just picked up the day before, was now completely ruined and would never be the same, no matter what the body shop did to it.
When the lawyer finally wound down from his ranting and raving, the officer shook his head in disgust and disbelief.
"I can't believe how materialistic you lawyers are," he said. "You are so focused on your possessions that you don't notice anything else."
"How can you say such a thing?" asked the lawyer.
The cop replied, "Don't you know that your left arm is missing from the elbow down? It must have been torn off when the truck hit you."
"Ahhh!" screamed the lawyer. "Where's my Rolex!"
Oct 18, 2009
A mail from My love..
Hi prabhu,
Yest I fought unnecessarily. But after cutting ur cal I felt bad. So first of all sorry for tat.u think tat I doubt u for talking wit girls tats not d fact.. truth s idont lyk d girls talking wit u.. not becos I don’t trust t s cos I don’t trust those girls. Before 2 yrs I thought prabhu would ne’er talk wit girls and oly he loves me but knowing certain things abt u later tat oly made me to doubt u. but now I know u can ne’er change since u ve suffered a lot cos of a girl nd moreover I know m so imp for u in ur life cos u love me than ur life.
As u said I ve more ppl around me to careme but I expect atleast a word of kindness from u.. even when I was bedridden for a week each and every sec I was thinking u…if I close ma eyes u come there if I open my eyes also u stay there.. excessive love on u oly make me to fight wit u and get angry on u more.
I ne’er fight wit my parents more but wit u cos I love u more than them… so wen ever I fight jus dnt stay without calling cos I ll expect ur cal. Whomever d mistake may be u cal me cos I cant cal cos of my arrogance.yest u didn’t cal tat would make me more angry and t ll ne’er subside. So pl do tis for me….
One thing I wanna say.. everytime when u speak abt ma family I feel tat u dnt ve any attachment towards them. My parents wish their son in law to be d eldest son of tis family. I too wish d same..i expect u to care my family more tan wat u do for me.tel me wil u be like tat?
After marriage we ll not ve more relatives and I ll also not dist u to take me to any of my relatives home but I wish u take care of my parents more cos they dnt ve anyone rather tan u and me. Wat do u say? Surely I ll take care of ur mom.. I ll be her daughter not as a daughter in law.. I promise..
Then darlu reply to my mail wat evr u think speak out da……….
LOVE YOU PRABHU……….
ALWAYS WANTED TO B WIT U OLY……….
WIL U B WIT ME?................
OLY AS MY PRABHU?
NOT EVEN A MIN U SHLD B WITHOUT ME………
EVERY SEC IN U R HANDS AND HEART…………….
SATHIYA
Yest I fought unnecessarily. But after cutting ur cal I felt bad. So first of all sorry for tat.u think tat I doubt u for talking wit girls tats not d fact.. truth s idont lyk d girls talking wit u.. not becos I don’t trust t s cos I don’t trust those girls. Before 2 yrs I thought prabhu would ne’er talk wit girls and oly he loves me but knowing certain things abt u later tat oly made me to doubt u. but now I know u can ne’er change since u ve suffered a lot cos of a girl nd moreover I know m so imp for u in ur life cos u love me than ur life.
As u said I ve more ppl around me to careme but I expect atleast a word of kindness from u.. even when I was bedridden for a week each and every sec I was thinking u…if I close ma eyes u come there if I open my eyes also u stay there.. excessive love on u oly make me to fight wit u and get angry on u more.
I ne’er fight wit my parents more but wit u cos I love u more than them… so wen ever I fight jus dnt stay without calling cos I ll expect ur cal. Whomever d mistake may be u cal me cos I cant cal cos of my arrogance.yest u didn’t cal tat would make me more angry and t ll ne’er subside. So pl do tis for me….
One thing I wanna say.. everytime when u speak abt ma family I feel tat u dnt ve any attachment towards them. My parents wish their son in law to be d eldest son of tis family. I too wish d same..i expect u to care my family more tan wat u do for me.tel me wil u be like tat?
After marriage we ll not ve more relatives and I ll also not dist u to take me to any of my relatives home but I wish u take care of my parents more cos they dnt ve anyone rather tan u and me. Wat do u say? Surely I ll take care of ur mom.. I ll be her daughter not as a daughter in law.. I promise..
Then darlu reply to my mail wat evr u think speak out da……….
LOVE YOU PRABHU……….
ALWAYS WANTED TO B WIT U OLY……….
WIL U B WIT ME?................
OLY AS MY PRABHU?
NOT EVEN A MIN U SHLD B WITHOUT ME………
EVERY SEC IN U R HANDS AND HEART…………….
SATHIYA
Jun 15, 2009
MEN AND WIVES
MEN AND WIVES
Every man should get married some time; after all, happiness is not the only thing in life!!
--Anonymous
Bachelors should be heavily taxed. It is not fair that some men should be happier than others.
--Oscar Wilde
Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper.
--Scottish Proverb
I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.
--Sam Kinison
A psychiatrist is a person who will give you expensive answers that your wife will give you for free.
--Anonymous
Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't, they'd be married too.
--H. L. Mencken
Men have a better time than women; for one thing, they marry later; for another thing, they die earlier.
--H. L. Mencken
"A man without a woman is like a fish without a bicycle."
- U2
Marriage is a three-ring circus: --engagement ring ---wedding ring ---suffering.
When a newly married couple smiles, everyone knows why. When a ten-year married couple smiles, everyone wonders why.
Love is blind but marriage is an eye-opener.
When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: either the car is new or the wife.
I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back to home always.
--Anonymous
I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary?" She said," Somewhere I have never been!" I told her, "How about the kitchen?"
--Anonymous
My wife was in beauty saloon for two hours. That was only for the estimate.
--Anonymous
She got a mudpack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off.
--Anonymous
She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?" Following her down the street I yelled, "No, jump in."
--Anonymous
Badd Teddy recently explained to me why he refuses to get to married. He says "the wedding rings look like miniature handcuffs....."
--Anonymous
If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife yelling at the front door, who do you let in first? The Dog of course...at least he'll shut up after u let him in!
--Anonymous
We always hold hands while walking in malls. If I let go, she starts shopping.
Every man should get married some time; after all, happiness is not the only thing in life!!
--Anonymous
Bachelors should be heavily taxed. It is not fair that some men should be happier than others.
--Oscar Wilde
Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper.
--Scottish Proverb
I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.
--Sam Kinison
A psychiatrist is a person who will give you expensive answers that your wife will give you for free.
--Anonymous
Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't, they'd be married too.
--H. L. Mencken
Men have a better time than women; for one thing, they marry later; for another thing, they die earlier.
--H. L. Mencken
"A man without a woman is like a fish without a bicycle."
- U2
Marriage is a three-ring circus: --engagement ring ---wedding ring ---suffering.
When a newly married couple smiles, everyone knows why. When a ten-year married couple smiles, everyone wonders why.
Love is blind but marriage is an eye-opener.
When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: either the car is new or the wife.
I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back to home always.
--Anonymous
I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary?" She said," Somewhere I have never been!" I told her, "How about the kitchen?"
--Anonymous
My wife was in beauty saloon for two hours. That was only for the estimate.
--Anonymous
She got a mudpack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off.
--Anonymous
She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?" Following her down the street I yelled, "No, jump in."
--Anonymous
Badd Teddy recently explained to me why he refuses to get to married. He says "the wedding rings look like miniature handcuffs....."
--Anonymous
If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife yelling at the front door, who do you let in first? The Dog of course...at least he'll shut up after u let him in!
--Anonymous
We always hold hands while walking in malls. If I let go, she starts shopping.
Feb 27, 2009
Walk In Interview at Chennai For Reddys..
Hi…………!
Greetings from Dr Reddy’s Laboratories Limited Hyderabad
We have career opportunities in the following areas for our Formulations manufacturing unit at Hyderabad:
Quality Control B.Sc/M.Sc with 2-6 Years experience in analysis of RM/PM/Finished products/Stability studies.
Hands on experience on HPLC/GC/Dissolution apparatus are essential.
Quality AssuranceB.Pharm/ M.Pharm with 2-6 Years of experience in handling manufacturing and analytical assurance, preferably in an FDA certified plant.
Production & Packing Diploma/D.Pharm/B.Sc with 2-3 years of experience in operation and maintenance of:
1. Packing : Blister,Bottle,Cartonator & Labeling Machine
2. Manufacturing : Granulation, Compression & Coating Machine
Engineering Services
Diploma (mechanical)/BE/B.Tech with 2-5 years experience in maintenance of process and utlity equipments
Age: 21-28 years
Candidates meeting the above requirements with good communication skills are invited to a walk-in-interview along with your latest copy of CV and Payslip.
Candidates who cannot attend the walk-in and interested in Dr Reddy’s career opportunities can send in their latest resumes to talent@drreddys.com with the ‘position applied for’ mentioned in the subject line.
Date: 1st March 2009(Sunday)
Time: 9:00 AM to 5:00 PM
Venue: Fortune Select Palms142, Rajiv Gandhi Salahi,Old Mahabalipuram Road,ThoraipakkamChennai 600096Ph- 044 39884444
Regards
Swamy Reddy
UradiTalent Acquisition Team –HRDr Reddy’s laboratories
Hyderabad
Phone: 040- 23041379
Greetings from Dr Reddy’s Laboratories Limited Hyderabad
We have career opportunities in the following areas for our Formulations manufacturing unit at Hyderabad:
Quality Control B.Sc/M.Sc with 2-6 Years experience in analysis of RM/PM/Finished products/Stability studies.
Hands on experience on HPLC/GC/Dissolution apparatus are essential.
Quality AssuranceB.Pharm/ M.Pharm with 2-6 Years of experience in handling manufacturing and analytical assurance, preferably in an FDA certified plant.
Production & Packing Diploma/D.Pharm/B.Sc with 2-3 years of experience in operation and maintenance of:
1. Packing : Blister,Bottle,Cartonator & Labeling Machine
2. Manufacturing : Granulation, Compression & Coating Machine
Engineering Services
Diploma (mechanical)/BE/B.Tech with 2-5 years experience in maintenance of process and utlity equipments
Age: 21-28 years
Candidates meeting the above requirements with good communication skills are invited to a walk-in-interview along with your latest copy of CV and Payslip.
Candidates who cannot attend the walk-in and interested in Dr Reddy’s career opportunities can send in their latest resumes to talent@drreddys.com with the ‘position applied for’ mentioned in the subject line.
Date: 1st March 2009(Sunday)
Time: 9:00 AM to 5:00 PM
Venue: Fortune Select Palms142, Rajiv Gandhi Salahi,Old Mahabalipuram Road,ThoraipakkamChennai 600096Ph- 044 39884444
Regards
Swamy Reddy
UradiTalent Acquisition Team –HRDr Reddy’s laboratories
Hyderabad
Phone: 040- 23041379
Feb 18, 2009
How to Propose ...
How to Propose A Girl
Are you hounded by the question of "how to propose a girl". As a solution to your problem, we are giving you some ideas for proposal to a girl. One of the things to keep in mind while proposing is that girls are usually more sensitive than guys and they like subtle ways of proposal. However, each and every girl is different from the other and the way of proposal should suit the temperament of the particular girl you are about to propose.
Still, on the basis of the usual personality traits of all girls, we are giving some generic ideas for proposing a girl on Valentine's Day as well as any other day:
"Old is Gold", this age-old adage comes true in the context of the all time favorite idea of proposing a girl by going down on the knees. This technique may be old, but it still helps in melting a girl's heart.
There is no need for using fanciful or big grandiloquent words to impress her. Rather, it may prove to be a big turn off. The best way is to express your true feeling in the simplest manner.
To show that you really care for her. Invite her to a quiet and romantic dinner for just the two of you, at your place. Prepare all her favorite dishes and play her favorite music. Along with your love, it will also show how much you know about her.
Prepare a banner, with the words "I Love You" or "Will You Marry Me". Stick this banner outside her home or her office, where she is bound to notice it. Please do not use her name on that banner. Better to use some nickname that only you two know of.
If you can afford, sky writing your proposal is an excellent idea. But make sure that you are with her when the proposal is written.
Proposing at the same place where both of you met for the first time or the place both of you have fond memories of, is a good idea.
If you have some beaches nearby, drive there in the evening. With soft music playing in your car, propose her when the sun is setting. The whole ambience will make her go weak in the knees.
How to Propose A Guy
Still, on the basis of the usual personality traits of all girls, we are giving some generic ideas for proposing a girl on Valentine's Day as well as any other day:
"Old is Gold", this age-old adage comes true in the context of the all time favorite idea of proposing a girl by going down on the knees. This technique may be old, but it still helps in melting a girl's heart.
There is no need for using fanciful or big grandiloquent words to impress her. Rather, it may prove to be a big turn off. The best way is to express your true feeling in the simplest manner.
To show that you really care for her. Invite her to a quiet and romantic dinner for just the two of you, at your place. Prepare all her favorite dishes and play her favorite music. Along with your love, it will also show how much you know about her.
Prepare a banner, with the words "I Love You" or "Will You Marry Me". Stick this banner outside her home or her office, where she is bound to notice it. Please do not use her name on that banner. Better to use some nickname that only you two know of.
If you can afford, sky writing your proposal is an excellent idea. But make sure that you are with her when the proposal is written.
Proposing at the same place where both of you met for the first time or the place both of you have fond memories of, is a good idea.
If you have some beaches nearby, drive there in the evening. With soft music playing in your car, propose her when the sun is setting. The whole ambience will make her go weak in the knees.
How to Propose A Guy
An unusual thing some time back, the idea of proposal to a guy is quite in these days. But, some girls still hesitate to take this step. And one of the major issues that further add to their reluctance is "how to propose a boy". So, as a solution to this problem, we are providing you with some ideas for proposing a guy on Valentine's Day. However, these generic ideas can be used whenever you want to propose that someone special, Valentine's Day or not.
If you can afford it, hire a billboard near his house. Flash your message on it. But, please do make sure that he sees the same. Otherwise, all your efforts will lead to no results.
Girls are not the only ones who love flowers. Keep sending him flowers every hour on the day you want to propose. And with the last one, send a message expressing your feelings.
Another way is to shower him with flower petals or laying a carpet of flower petals to walk on. When the showering or the carpet ends, go down on your knees and tell him how much you love him.
Make a video, telling him about your feelings like how much you love him and care for him. Get this cassette or CD delivered to him and wait for his reply. Better still, be with him when he watches the video. You will get to see his immediate reaction.
Take him out for some romantic movie. With the help of the theater staff, display the words "I Love You (Name)" or "(Name), Will You Marry Me", just before the movie starts.
Another way of proposing is to announce it on the radio. But, first make sure that he listens to the radio and is tuned on the same station on which you are going to make the announcement.
Feb 10, 2009
Are we friends or not..
Are we friends
Or
Are we not?!
You told me once,
But I
Forgot
So tell me ‘now’
And tell me
‘True’
So I can say
I’m here for ‘you’
Of all the friends
I have ever met..
You are the ‘one’
I’ll never forgot.
And if I die
Before you do
I’ ll go to heaven
And wait for
‘You’
Or
Are we not?!
You told me once,
But I
Forgot
So tell me ‘now’
And tell me
‘True’
So I can say
I’m here for ‘you’
Of all the friends
I have ever met..
You are the ‘one’
I’ll never forgot.
And if I die
Before you do
I’ ll go to heaven
And wait for
‘You’
Jan 17, 2009
Plane Down in Hudson River
All of the US Airways passengers aboard a jet that went down in the frigid waters of the Hudson River off Manhattan are reported to be safe, the New York Times reports. Flight 1549 apparently flew into a flock of geese, disabling at least one engine, according to MSNBC. Authorities quickly reported that terrorism was not suspected, and no casualties were immediately reported.
“I just thought, ‘Why is it so low?’ And, splash, it hit the water,” a witness told the AP. Police divers were dropped into the water near the Airbus A380, which left LaGuardia airport for Charlotte, NC, at 3:26pm with 146 passengers and five crew members on board. The aircraft was floating southward in the river as passengers crowded onto the wings. The air temperature in New York today is in the teens.
Jan 4, 2009
North Indian Wife Vs South Indian Wife
*** WHAT IT MEANS TO HAVE A North Indian GIRL as WIFE ***
1. At the time of marriage, a north Indian girl has more boyfriends than her age.
2. Before marriage, she looks almost like a bollywood heroine and after marriage you have to go around her twice to completely hug her.
3. By the time she professes her undevoted love to you, you are bankrupt because of the number of times you had to take her out to movies, theatres and restaurants. And you wait longingly for her dowry.
4. The only dishes she can think of to cook is paneer butter masala, aloo sabji, aloo gobi sabji, aloo matar, aloo paneer, that after eating all those paneer and aloos you are either in the bed with chronic cholestrol or chronic gas disorder.
5. The only growth that you see later in your career is the rise in your monthly phone bill.
6. You are blinded by her love that you think that she is a blonde. Only later do you come to know that it is because of the mehandhi that she applies to cover her grey hair.
7. When you come home from office she is very busy watching "Kyonki saas bhi kabi bahu thi" that you either end up eating outside or cooking yourself.
8. You are a very "ESpecial" person to her.
9. She always thought that Madras is a state and covers the whole of south india until she met you.
10. When she says she is going to "work out" she means she is going to " walk out"
11. She has greater number of relatives than the number of people you have in your home town.
12. The only two sentences in English that she knows are "Thank you" and "How are you"
*** WHAT IT MEANS TO HAVE A South Indian GIRL as WIFE ***
1.Her mother looks down at you because you didn't study in IIT or Madras / Anna University .
2. Her father starts or ends every conversation with " ... I say..."
3. She shudders if you use four letter words.
4. She has long hair, neatly oiled and braided (The Dubai based Oil Well Company will negotiate with her on a 25 year contract to extract coconut oil from her hair.)
5. She uses the word 'Super' as her only superlative.
6. Her name is another name for a Goddess or a flower.
7. Her first name is longer than your first name, middle name and surname combined (unless you are from Andhra)
8. When she mixes milk/curd and rice you are never sure whether it is for the dog or for herself.
9. For weddings, she sports a mini jasmine garden on her head and wears silk saris in the Madras heat without looking too uncomfortable while you are melting in your singlet.
10. Her favourite cricketer is Krishnamachari Srikkanth.
11. Her favourite food is dosa though she has tried North Indian snacks like Chats (pronounced like the slang for 'conversation')
12. She bores you by telling you which raaga each song you hear is based on.
13. You have to give her jewellery, though she has already got plenty of it ..
14. Her Mangal Sutra weighs more than the championship belts worn by WWF wrestlers.
15. Her father thinks she is much smarter than you
1. At the time of marriage, a north Indian girl has more boyfriends than her age.
2. Before marriage, she looks almost like a bollywood heroine and after marriage you have to go around her twice to completely hug her.
3. By the time she professes her undevoted love to you, you are bankrupt because of the number of times you had to take her out to movies, theatres and restaurants. And you wait longingly for her dowry.
4. The only dishes she can think of to cook is paneer butter masala, aloo sabji, aloo gobi sabji, aloo matar, aloo paneer, that after eating all those paneer and aloos you are either in the bed with chronic cholestrol or chronic gas disorder.
5. The only growth that you see later in your career is the rise in your monthly phone bill.
6. You are blinded by her love that you think that she is a blonde. Only later do you come to know that it is because of the mehandhi that she applies to cover her grey hair.
7. When you come home from office she is very busy watching "Kyonki saas bhi kabi bahu thi" that you either end up eating outside or cooking yourself.
8. You are a very "ESpecial" person to her.
9. She always thought that Madras is a state and covers the whole of south india until she met you.
10. When she says she is going to "work out" she means she is going to " walk out"
11. She has greater number of relatives than the number of people you have in your home town.
12. The only two sentences in English that she knows are "Thank you" and "How are you"
*** WHAT IT MEANS TO HAVE A South Indian GIRL as WIFE ***
1.Her mother looks down at you because you didn't study in IIT or Madras / Anna University .
2. Her father starts or ends every conversation with " ... I say..."
3. She shudders if you use four letter words.
4. She has long hair, neatly oiled and braided (The Dubai based Oil Well Company will negotiate with her on a 25 year contract to extract coconut oil from her hair.)
5. She uses the word 'Super' as her only superlative.
6. Her name is another name for a Goddess or a flower.
7. Her first name is longer than your first name, middle name and surname combined (unless you are from Andhra)
8. When she mixes milk/curd and rice you are never sure whether it is for the dog or for herself.
9. For weddings, she sports a mini jasmine garden on her head and wears silk saris in the Madras heat without looking too uncomfortable while you are melting in your singlet.
10. Her favourite cricketer is Krishnamachari Srikkanth.
11. Her favourite food is dosa though she has tried North Indian snacks like Chats (pronounced like the slang for 'conversation')
12. She bores you by telling you which raaga each song you hear is based on.
13. You have to give her jewellery, though she has already got plenty of it ..
14. Her Mangal Sutra weighs more than the championship belts worn by WWF wrestlers.
15. Her father thinks she is much smarter than you
Jan 3, 2009
Whos shot is really goood..
A 90-year-old man was having his annual checkup. The doctor asked him how he was feeling. "I've never been better," the old man replied. "I've got an eighteen-year-old bride who's pregnant & delivered a child. What is your opinion about that, Doc?" the old man asked.
The doctor thought for a moment, then said, "Well, let me tell you a story. I know a guy who is a hunter. He never misses a season for hunting. But, one day he's in a bit of a hurry and he accidentally grabs his umbrella instead of his gun.
The doctor continued, "So he's walking in the woods near a creek, and suddenly he spots a lion in some bush in front of him. He raises up his umbrella, points it at the lion and squeezes the handle.BAM! The lion drops dead in front of him.
""That's impossible!" said the old man in disbelief. Someone else must have shot that lion.
""Exactly"... Said the Doc.
The doctor thought for a moment, then said, "Well, let me tell you a story. I know a guy who is a hunter. He never misses a season for hunting. But, one day he's in a bit of a hurry and he accidentally grabs his umbrella instead of his gun.
The doctor continued, "So he's walking in the woods near a creek, and suddenly he spots a lion in some bush in front of him. He raises up his umbrella, points it at the lion and squeezes the handle.BAM! The lion drops dead in front of him.
""That's impossible!" said the old man in disbelief. Someone else must have shot that lion.
""Exactly"... Said the Doc.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
