The boss of a big company needed to call one of his employees about an urgent problem with one of the main computers.
He dialed the employees home phone number and was greeted with a child's whispered on the first ring, "Hello?"
Feeling put out at the inconvenience of having to talk to a youngster the boss asked, "Is your Daddy home?".
"Yes.", whispered the small voice.
May I talk with him?", the man asked.
To the surprise of the boss, the small voice whispered, "No."
Wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your Mommy there?".
"Yes.", came the answer.
"May I talk with her?".
Again the small voice whispered, "No."
Knowing that it was not likely that a young child would be left home alone, the boss decided he would just leave a message with the person who should be there watching over the child. "Is there any one there besides you?", the boss asked the child.
"Yes", whispered the child, "A policeman."
Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked, "May I speak with the policeman?".
"No, he's busy.", whispered the child.
"Busy doing what?", asked the boss.
"Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman.", came the whispered answer.
Growing concerned and even worried as he heard what sounded like a helicopter through the ear piece on the phone the boss asked, "What is that noise?".
"A hello-copper.", answered the whispering voice.
"What is going on there?", asked the boss, now alarmed.
In an awed whispering voice the child answered, "The search team just landed the hello-copper!"
Alarmed, concerned and more than just a little frustrated the boss asked, "Why are they there?"
Still whispering, the young voice replied along with a muffled giggle, "They're looking for me!"
Dec 15, 2009
Parents These Days
At one point during a game, the coach said to one of his young players, "Do you understand what cooperation is? What a team is?"
The little boy nodded in the affirmative.
"Do you understand that what matters is whether we win together as a team?"
The little boy nodded yes.
"So," the coach continued, "when a strike is called, or you're out at first, you don't argue or curse or attack the umpire. Do you understand all that?"
Again the little boy nodded.
"Good," said the coach. "Now go over there and explain that to your mother."
The little boy nodded in the affirmative.
"Do you understand that what matters is whether we win together as a team?"
The little boy nodded yes.
"So," the coach continued, "when a strike is called, or you're out at first, you don't argue or curse or attack the umpire. Do you understand all that?"
Again the little boy nodded.
"Good," said the coach. "Now go over there and explain that to your mother."
Dec 10, 2009
Do You Know Me?
A small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness to the stand in a trial -- a grandmotherly, elderly woman.
He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"
She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a young boy. And frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a rising big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you will never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."
The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Williams, do you know the defense attorney?"
She replied, "Why, yes I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. I used to baby-sit him for his parents. And he, too, has been a real disappointment to me. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. The man can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the shoddiest in the entire state. Yes, I know him."
At this point, the judge rapped the courtroom to silence and called both counselors to the bench.
In a very quiet voice, he said with menace, "If either of you asks her if she knows me, you'll be jailed for contempt!"
He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"
She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a young boy. And frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a rising big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you will never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."
The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Williams, do you know the defense attorney?"
She replied, "Why, yes I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. I used to baby-sit him for his parents. And he, too, has been a real disappointment to me. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. The man can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the shoddiest in the entire state. Yes, I know him."
At this point, the judge rapped the courtroom to silence and called both counselors to the bench.
In a very quiet voice, he said with menace, "If either of you asks her if she knows me, you'll be jailed for contempt!"
Hit and Run case
A very successful lawyer parked his brand-new Lexus in front of his office, ready to show it off to his colleagues. As he got out, a truck passed too close and completely tore the door off of the driver's side. The counselor immediately grabbed his cell phone, dialed 911, and within minutes a policeman pulled up.
Before the officer had a chance to ask any questions, the lawyer started screaming hysterically. His Lexus, which he had just picked up the day before, was now completely ruined and would never be the same, no matter what the body shop did to it.
When the lawyer finally wound down from his ranting and raving, the officer shook his head in disgust and disbelief.
"I can't believe how materialistic you lawyers are," he said. "You are so focused on your possessions that you don't notice anything else."
"How can you say such a thing?" asked the lawyer.
The cop replied, "Don't you know that your left arm is missing from the elbow down? It must have been torn off when the truck hit you."
"Ahhh!" screamed the lawyer. "Where's my Rolex!"
Before the officer had a chance to ask any questions, the lawyer started screaming hysterically. His Lexus, which he had just picked up the day before, was now completely ruined and would never be the same, no matter what the body shop did to it.
When the lawyer finally wound down from his ranting and raving, the officer shook his head in disgust and disbelief.
"I can't believe how materialistic you lawyers are," he said. "You are so focused on your possessions that you don't notice anything else."
"How can you say such a thing?" asked the lawyer.
The cop replied, "Don't you know that your left arm is missing from the elbow down? It must have been torn off when the truck hit you."
"Ahhh!" screamed the lawyer. "Where's my Rolex!"
Oct 18, 2009
A mail from My love..
Hi prabhu,
Yest I fought unnecessarily. But after cutting ur cal I felt bad. So first of all sorry for tat.u think tat I doubt u for talking wit girls tats not d fact.. truth s idont lyk d girls talking wit u.. not becos I don’t trust t s cos I don’t trust those girls. Before 2 yrs I thought prabhu would ne’er talk wit girls and oly he loves me but knowing certain things abt u later tat oly made me to doubt u. but now I know u can ne’er change since u ve suffered a lot cos of a girl nd moreover I know m so imp for u in ur life cos u love me than ur life.
As u said I ve more ppl around me to careme but I expect atleast a word of kindness from u.. even when I was bedridden for a week each and every sec I was thinking u…if I close ma eyes u come there if I open my eyes also u stay there.. excessive love on u oly make me to fight wit u and get angry on u more.
I ne’er fight wit my parents more but wit u cos I love u more than them… so wen ever I fight jus dnt stay without calling cos I ll expect ur cal. Whomever d mistake may be u cal me cos I cant cal cos of my arrogance.yest u didn’t cal tat would make me more angry and t ll ne’er subside. So pl do tis for me….
One thing I wanna say.. everytime when u speak abt ma family I feel tat u dnt ve any attachment towards them. My parents wish their son in law to be d eldest son of tis family. I too wish d same..i expect u to care my family more tan wat u do for me.tel me wil u be like tat?
After marriage we ll not ve more relatives and I ll also not dist u to take me to any of my relatives home but I wish u take care of my parents more cos they dnt ve anyone rather tan u and me. Wat do u say? Surely I ll take care of ur mom.. I ll be her daughter not as a daughter in law.. I promise..
Then darlu reply to my mail wat evr u think speak out da……….
LOVE YOU PRABHU……….
ALWAYS WANTED TO B WIT U OLY……….
WIL U B WIT ME?................
OLY AS MY PRABHU?
NOT EVEN A MIN U SHLD B WITHOUT ME………
EVERY SEC IN U R HANDS AND HEART…………….
SATHIYA
Yest I fought unnecessarily. But after cutting ur cal I felt bad. So first of all sorry for tat.u think tat I doubt u for talking wit girls tats not d fact.. truth s idont lyk d girls talking wit u.. not becos I don’t trust t s cos I don’t trust those girls. Before 2 yrs I thought prabhu would ne’er talk wit girls and oly he loves me but knowing certain things abt u later tat oly made me to doubt u. but now I know u can ne’er change since u ve suffered a lot cos of a girl nd moreover I know m so imp for u in ur life cos u love me than ur life.
As u said I ve more ppl around me to careme but I expect atleast a word of kindness from u.. even when I was bedridden for a week each and every sec I was thinking u…if I close ma eyes u come there if I open my eyes also u stay there.. excessive love on u oly make me to fight wit u and get angry on u more.
I ne’er fight wit my parents more but wit u cos I love u more than them… so wen ever I fight jus dnt stay without calling cos I ll expect ur cal. Whomever d mistake may be u cal me cos I cant cal cos of my arrogance.yest u didn’t cal tat would make me more angry and t ll ne’er subside. So pl do tis for me….
One thing I wanna say.. everytime when u speak abt ma family I feel tat u dnt ve any attachment towards them. My parents wish their son in law to be d eldest son of tis family. I too wish d same..i expect u to care my family more tan wat u do for me.tel me wil u be like tat?
After marriage we ll not ve more relatives and I ll also not dist u to take me to any of my relatives home but I wish u take care of my parents more cos they dnt ve anyone rather tan u and me. Wat do u say? Surely I ll take care of ur mom.. I ll be her daughter not as a daughter in law.. I promise..
Then darlu reply to my mail wat evr u think speak out da……….
LOVE YOU PRABHU……….
ALWAYS WANTED TO B WIT U OLY……….
WIL U B WIT ME?................
OLY AS MY PRABHU?
NOT EVEN A MIN U SHLD B WITHOUT ME………
EVERY SEC IN U R HANDS AND HEART…………….
SATHIYA
Jun 15, 2009
MEN AND WIVES
MEN AND WIVES
Every man should get married some time; after all, happiness is not the only thing in life!!
--Anonymous
Bachelors should be heavily taxed. It is not fair that some men should be happier than others.
--Oscar Wilde
Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper.
--Scottish Proverb
I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.
--Sam Kinison
A psychiatrist is a person who will give you expensive answers that your wife will give you for free.
--Anonymous
Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't, they'd be married too.
--H. L. Mencken
Men have a better time than women; for one thing, they marry later; for another thing, they die earlier.
--H. L. Mencken
"A man without a woman is like a fish without a bicycle."
- U2
Marriage is a three-ring circus: --engagement ring ---wedding ring ---suffering.
When a newly married couple smiles, everyone knows why. When a ten-year married couple smiles, everyone wonders why.
Love is blind but marriage is an eye-opener.
When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: either the car is new or the wife.
I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back to home always.
--Anonymous
I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary?" She said," Somewhere I have never been!" I told her, "How about the kitchen?"
--Anonymous
My wife was in beauty saloon for two hours. That was only for the estimate.
--Anonymous
She got a mudpack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off.
--Anonymous
She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?" Following her down the street I yelled, "No, jump in."
--Anonymous
Badd Teddy recently explained to me why he refuses to get to married. He says "the wedding rings look like miniature handcuffs....."
--Anonymous
If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife yelling at the front door, who do you let in first? The Dog of course...at least he'll shut up after u let him in!
--Anonymous
We always hold hands while walking in malls. If I let go, she starts shopping.
Every man should get married some time; after all, happiness is not the only thing in life!!
--Anonymous
Bachelors should be heavily taxed. It is not fair that some men should be happier than others.
--Oscar Wilde
Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper.
--Scottish Proverb
I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.
--Sam Kinison
A psychiatrist is a person who will give you expensive answers that your wife will give you for free.
--Anonymous
Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't, they'd be married too.
--H. L. Mencken
Men have a better time than women; for one thing, they marry later; for another thing, they die earlier.
--H. L. Mencken
"A man without a woman is like a fish without a bicycle."
- U2
Marriage is a three-ring circus: --engagement ring ---wedding ring ---suffering.
When a newly married couple smiles, everyone knows why. When a ten-year married couple smiles, everyone wonders why.
Love is blind but marriage is an eye-opener.
When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: either the car is new or the wife.
I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back to home always.
--Anonymous
I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary?" She said," Somewhere I have never been!" I told her, "How about the kitchen?"
--Anonymous
My wife was in beauty saloon for two hours. That was only for the estimate.
--Anonymous
She got a mudpack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off.
--Anonymous
She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?" Following her down the street I yelled, "No, jump in."
--Anonymous
Badd Teddy recently explained to me why he refuses to get to married. He says "the wedding rings look like miniature handcuffs....."
--Anonymous
If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife yelling at the front door, who do you let in first? The Dog of course...at least he'll shut up after u let him in!
--Anonymous
We always hold hands while walking in malls. If I let go, she starts shopping.
Feb 27, 2009
Walk In Interview at Chennai For Reddys..
Hi…………!
Greetings from Dr Reddy’s Laboratories Limited Hyderabad
We have career opportunities in the following areas for our Formulations manufacturing unit at Hyderabad:
Quality Control B.Sc/M.Sc with 2-6 Years experience in analysis of RM/PM/Finished products/Stability studies.
Hands on experience on HPLC/GC/Dissolution apparatus are essential.
Quality AssuranceB.Pharm/ M.Pharm with 2-6 Years of experience in handling manufacturing and analytical assurance, preferably in an FDA certified plant.
Production & Packing Diploma/D.Pharm/B.Sc with 2-3 years of experience in operation and maintenance of:
1. Packing : Blister,Bottle,Cartonator & Labeling Machine
2. Manufacturing : Granulation, Compression & Coating Machine
Engineering Services
Diploma (mechanical)/BE/B.Tech with 2-5 years experience in maintenance of process and utlity equipments
Age: 21-28 years
Candidates meeting the above requirements with good communication skills are invited to a walk-in-interview along with your latest copy of CV and Payslip.
Candidates who cannot attend the walk-in and interested in Dr Reddy’s career opportunities can send in their latest resumes to talent@drreddys.com with the ‘position applied for’ mentioned in the subject line.
Date: 1st March 2009(Sunday)
Time: 9:00 AM to 5:00 PM
Venue: Fortune Select Palms142, Rajiv Gandhi Salahi,Old Mahabalipuram Road,ThoraipakkamChennai 600096Ph- 044 39884444
Regards
Swamy Reddy
UradiTalent Acquisition Team –HRDr Reddy’s laboratories
Hyderabad
Phone: 040- 23041379
Greetings from Dr Reddy’s Laboratories Limited Hyderabad
We have career opportunities in the following areas for our Formulations manufacturing unit at Hyderabad:
Quality Control B.Sc/M.Sc with 2-6 Years experience in analysis of RM/PM/Finished products/Stability studies.
Hands on experience on HPLC/GC/Dissolution apparatus are essential.
Quality AssuranceB.Pharm/ M.Pharm with 2-6 Years of experience in handling manufacturing and analytical assurance, preferably in an FDA certified plant.
Production & Packing Diploma/D.Pharm/B.Sc with 2-3 years of experience in operation and maintenance of:
1. Packing : Blister,Bottle,Cartonator & Labeling Machine
2. Manufacturing : Granulation, Compression & Coating Machine
Engineering Services
Diploma (mechanical)/BE/B.Tech with 2-5 years experience in maintenance of process and utlity equipments
Age: 21-28 years
Candidates meeting the above requirements with good communication skills are invited to a walk-in-interview along with your latest copy of CV and Payslip.
Candidates who cannot attend the walk-in and interested in Dr Reddy’s career opportunities can send in their latest resumes to talent@drreddys.com with the ‘position applied for’ mentioned in the subject line.
Date: 1st March 2009(Sunday)
Time: 9:00 AM to 5:00 PM
Venue: Fortune Select Palms142, Rajiv Gandhi Salahi,Old Mahabalipuram Road,ThoraipakkamChennai 600096Ph- 044 39884444
Regards
Swamy Reddy
UradiTalent Acquisition Team –HRDr Reddy’s laboratories
Hyderabad
Phone: 040- 23041379
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